Sleepless night

I guess I'll be having isomnia tonight.

Emo songs are all stuck up in my ears and it doesn't seems to be working. Perhaps is, my tears are all dried up already. It's only a matter of time, I use to tell myself this. But now, after listening to what babi say, it's a matter of my courage and thinking. Certainly I do agree.

Some stupid thoughts are stuck up in my head and it seems to be leaving. Most probably, I'll have lesser sleepless nights now.

I've learn to be mature.
I've learn to let go things easily.

I'm fine, I'm great and I feel good.
Look into another perspective of my life, there's so much more to explore. Life isn't a cup of cupnoodle, instead, it's a bowl of herbal soup. In order to see the outcome, you gotta brew it for a very long time, then you'll have the positive effect. Right??????
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I'm talking to my oh so sweet wife now. And we're making rubbish comments.
Oh my, I have totally no idea why I am laughing hysterically down here. Ohmygod. =="


Though it's rubbish down here, but it's from the bottom of my heart. I hope you can see how much I yearn to talk to you. You use to be my laughter and joy. It seems like I could even reach for the stars when I'm with you. The pain and smile I ever had, I only can feel it once. Once, I've got this kinda of smile and once, the first and last time I ever feel so heartbroken. Now I'm feeling very very empty. When I'm crying, where were you? Wiping my tears away and giving me comforting words.

Though I have friends and family. But how many knows how I feel? I'd just feel damn empty? Know what I'm thinking deep down in my heart? I would just simply read through the past chats we had. But tears would just keep rolling down, but I couldn't control it. And, I've said it once, my tears are so naughty that it wouldn't listen to me, it'd just keep flowing, like the endless stream.

Though we're through now, you gave me alot of memories. It's 205th day now. Counting endlessly and hoping that this counting would stop eventually. I don't know how to express it, and this is really how I feel.

It's day 205. I wonder when it would stop. I wonder would you ever see this. I just wanna say, I'm sorry though it isn't my fault. I'm sorry for being a disturbance to you and your life. This is my biggest courage, I wanted to talk to you and sort things out. Cos I don't wanna be dump just like that, without knowing why. But it seems that I couldn't bring out my best courage to talk to you. I just feel like banging my head against the wall and have amnesia. Lastly, I'm sorry. I'd just hope we'll talk like once. And also, feelings will eventually fade. Because, I shouldn't be stuck in you forever. It's just like one-side love. I'm clear with my thoughts now. I swear. You'll only be part in my memory.